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Twilight: Eclipse 

Why do I do this to myself? Yes, I skipped a movie, maybe I’ll get back to it later.

The first scene of the movie is not instilling a lot of confidence in me.

"I smell pretentious symbolism"

"I love touching pretentious symbolism"

"Get your hands off my symbolism"

"Why is nighttime in Forks teal?" "Do not question the infinite wisdom of the art direction." "I-" "SILENCE MORTAL. ANYWAY, BACK TO MY GANG RAPE STORY."

They had bronzer during the Great Depression? Twilight is teaching me so much about history.

"WHY DID I HAVE TO DIE WEARING A BEAVER JACKET"

Forks High has such lovely, complementary school colors.

Do vampire families really coordinate their outfits? Maybe that’s why they don’t sleep, they’re busy bickering about the color scheme of the day.

Yes, really lean in to that punch, maybe it’ll reverse that “sudden southern accent”itis you’ve got.

Why doesn’t MY boyfriend make that face at me?

In other news, I’ve added Disqus so leave some comments, lovelies!

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Twilight 

Oh yes.

He’s staring a little bit TOO intently at the back of her head, there.

So, what I think Twilight is trying to tell us is…cloudy weather makes everything teal?

Okay, okay, technically it’s blue and orange but it’s basically the same thing.

OH HELLO TWILIGHT THAT IS A NICE SUBTLE CAMEO YOU GOT THERE I WONDER WHO THE WOMAN IN THE FOREGROUND IS I HAVE NO IDEA.

Maybe I’ll also do New Moon and Eclipse when I feel masochistic.

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